Monday, December 12, 2005

The Outlet of Life

Can you imagine living on a bed for 27 years and not being able to move from the neck down?
For me, my life would have no more color if I was not able to move again. But this is a real experience about a handicapped person whom I knew in Hualien.

I’ve lived in Hualien for four years. Hualien is the most beautiful place in Taiwan. There is a national park in this area with beautiful sunshine, blue sky, ocean, and whales. The wind from the ocean always pats your face, telling you there’s always a dream.

During that summer in 2003, I worked as a substitute teacher at an elementary school. “I wanted to spend some time with the native people and not always be with kids,” I thought. I needed a new plan for the next semester. So my friend, who is a faithful Christian, introduced me to a charity organization to be a volunteer. It was located in a four-floor building right by the ocean and cultural center. The organization offers several kinds of services, such as feeding paralyzed people, cleaning houses for seniors, taking care of handicapped kids and talking to those who are so-called “residents” in this charity.

I began my feeding work from that time, from the beginning of knowing about nothing. I imagined being in their shoes, having to be fed by someone else, figuring out the best speed and way I should scoop the food from the bowl to their mouths. I noticed that unlike older ones, every younger resident had their interests, like painting, writing and watching puppet shows. But they were unable to do those things on their own.

Their life was all about waiting and relying on other people. Even though they still have desires to live a normal life, it is tough for them to do simple things.

One of the residents, Gao Hao-qing, was well-educated. Before the accident that paralyzed him, he was working in a publicly-owned company. That accident was in 1978 while he was a young man with a bright future. Falling down from four-story-high building shattered his dreams.

When I first saw him, he lay on the bed which was covered with a green sheet. He was reading a book related to the gospel. His back was facing the door so that he didn’t notice me as I entered. Then he gave me a sheet of paper that he has written about his life. I started to know about him and other residents.

If you asked me, “What is the meaning of life?” I would answer, “It is a process of searching for an outlet of life.” The Holy Bible says, “A bruised reed shall he not break, and smoking flax shall he not quench.” It has been said:” If Heavenly Father closes a door of your life, He shall open another window for you.” I remember when I first came to the Men-Nou foundation, brother Gao wanted me to help him write. He said a sentence, then I wrote it down. He told me the hardest thing about writing is that nobody is there to help him write the moment he thinks of something. He always has to wait for someone to help him write, but when someone finally comes, he usually has forgotten what he would like to say. His biggest hope is to be able to write by himself.

Because they have urine bags, the toilet means nothing to them. I remember one cold December night, I got there to help them fold urine bags. He said sometimes these bags break, making a pretty bad mess on his bed. If I was him, I don’t know if I would be able to relearn all those trivial things that are so simple and easy for most of us. We always think we should learn more and own more and never feel satisfied. Sometimes we forget to look back and enjoy those things we already own.

Writing on his own is a big hope for Gao Hao-qing. Because he is well-educated, he is able to write well, just like a writer. Many people encourage him to write about the charity foundation. This is a good way to let people know about this charity foundation and the people here. Therefore, people might offer their energy and time to help these people.

Christmas was about to come. Men-Nou foundation had a party for all of the residents and volunteers. People were gathering in the lobby and watching the performances which were prepared by the people that work there. I had never known if I was important to those people who lived in this hospital-like building. People come and leave having no chance to know each other very well. I thought I was going to be one of those people that leave without getting to know them very well. Most of the residences lied on the moving bed to see the performance. But some of them, including Gao Hao-qing, only thought of moving back to their room. In their mind, those things are a routine, having no meaning anymore.

Time passed by, I was getting to know these residents very well. I wrote for them, mailed for them, and held books for them. Other residents, who lied next to Gao Hao-qing, also became my good friends. I found out my important role is to be a joker. I don’t care much about my personal well-being as much as I want them to be happy.

Spring was coming, brother Gao told me his University classmates donated some money to help him buy a kind of special computer that is designed for handicapped people. This computer has a laser pen for typing which is strapped around a person's head. They can then point the laser on the screen and select the character they want. This technology is perfect for brother Gao because he can only move his head.

In 2005, I left Hualien. Before I left, I got an e-mail from brother Gao. He wrote, “I can type on my own now. I don’t need people waiting while I think anymore.” I am so glad he is able to type by himself now. He can now write many good stories and influence people for good. His most important stories are his testimonies of our Heavenly Father. His life is a testimony of perseverance and faith.